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Two years later, degree vanishes...Two years ago, Computer Engineering was at the top of the fields for lucrative degrees... Now it is not even on the list... Did the degree get lumped into Computer Science or did something else happen??? I think I'm doing OK for an entry level Computer Engineer but what does this say about the market? It'll be interesting to see what happens in the next decade and if CS degrees in general are a dying breed in the US because of all the outsourcing...
2004 Data - 2006 Data
...get a MBA. It'll help keep you from being outsourced. Read me.
This is definately the nail in the coffin that will make me finish my MBA... I was starting to doubt going back now that I have a new job but this article was exactly what I was toiling over.
Ramblings...School has been really REALLY different than what I am used to. We are writing and discuss so many things that are opinionated instead of factual that it is almost not school to me. I have to write a 4 page paper on how I applied a managerial skill to a situation at work. I need to explain how equality in the workforce affects the moral. About the only thing factual is my accounting class which itself feels like I am in kindergarten (assigned seats, participation points, when we ask a question the prof does not know how to answer - she makes us give her an answer that we "think" would be fair)... Its just really odd. I'm so used to having confident teachers that care about the students learning their material and now I'm thrown into classes "taught" by researchers who don't know how to teach, and are more concerned with writing their books (literally) than the sucess of the class... It should be a fun three years.
On the gaming scene, LOTR Battle for Middle Earth and Freelancer have been put on hold so I can finish LOTR The Third Age for PS2. It's been a more mindless game that really helps me wind down. Plus I can stay downstairs with Totem and Alex instead of disappearing up to my office...
I've just finished updating Gentoo on my laptop. After I got wireless working, I updated KDE and basically everything else on the system. The only task now is to get WEP working so I can actually use my own wireless network at home and not have to bum the neighbor's open wireless connections. I also got a new toy. Hopefully by the end of the week I'll have a DVD Lightscribe drive in my hands. I'm looking forward to it for the snazzy "labels" I'll be able to make, but more importantly, it will do more than my current DVD burner. I found out last week that the old HP 600i dvd burner (which I have), can ONLY write to DVD+RW discs. Not DVD+R, DVD-R, or DVD-RW. It took me awhile to figure this out, and a lot of misc media purchases, but I'm glad I have a "modern" burner coming so I can use all the media I bought and have not been able to use. ;) Plus I get to do lightscribe and DVD DL too! =)
Alex is getting huge. =) He has his own personality and LOVES to giggle. He's even showing the "dog salivates when you ring a bell" type stuff too. I'll pick him up out of his crib in the morning and he starts smiling and laughing. If I don't have a bottom there waiting for him, he starts screaming. ;) And I think he's going to like cooking b/c he sure likes to BAM!!! =)
I'm definately in a different mindset in gradute schol then I was in for undergraduate and even high school...
People would always tell me that high school was the best time of their lives... I think it was my worst. I didn't enjoy it. I felt pressured to go to school and "perform" to someone else's standards. I honestly think the only skill that I actually learned in high school was how to bull$hit. It is four years of my life I want to forget.
Undergraduate college was the best four year of my life IMHO. I had a great time. I met a TON of friends and felt good about what I was doing. But I still attended because I "had to". You can't get a decent job anymore without that magic peice of paper. So while I enjoyed the four years and loved doing what I did, it was still something that was just assumed you had to do.
But my graduate time, while still only in its infancy, is turning out to be completly different. The students and even the professors are in a different mindset. Everyone works and understands that you work (it is a night program). The work load is a different kind of load since I'm used to engineering type assignments. Still tough, but a different kind of tough... More importantly, I wasn't forced by anyone or any group to attend. I chose to go to grad school on my own to better my career. That is definately something I cannot say about my bachelor's degree or high school.
It's also very motivating. I'm encouraged by the different style of classes and the way thing work out. I'm very excited for the coming years. And, when I finish it all, I hope I can walk away feeling content and happy with what I just accomplished. Instead of just walking away saying, "OK, now I have a degree, my magic piece of paper. So what do I do now???"
Observations...I'm definately in a different mindset in gradute schol then I was in for undergraduate and even high school...
People would always tell me that high school was the best time of their lives... I think it was my worst. I didn't enjoy it. I felt pressured to go to school and "perform" to someone else's standards. I honestly think the only skill that I actually learned in high school was how to bull$hit. It is four years of my life I want to forget.
Undergraduate college was the best four year of my life IMHO. I had a great time. I met a TON of friends and felt good about what I was doing. But I still attended because I "had to". You can't get a decent job anymore without that magic peice of paper. So while I enjoyed the four years and loved doing what I did, it was still something that was just assumed you had to do.
But my graduate time, while still only in its infancy, is turning out to be completly different. The students and even the professors are in a different mindset. Everyone works and understands that you work (it is a night program). The work load is a different kind of load since I'm used to engineering type assignments. Still tough, but a different kind of tough... More importantly, I wasn't forced by anyone or any group to attend. I chose to go to grad school on my own to better my career. That is definately something I cannot say about my bachelor's degree or high school.
It's also very motivating. I'm encouraged by the different style of classes and the way thing work out. I'm very excited for the coming years. And, when I finish it all, I hope I can walk away feeling content and happy with what I just accomplished. Instead of just walking away saying, "OK, now I have a degree, my magic piece of paper. So what do I do now???"
School is odd... They are doing things for me. Classes are being scheduled for me. Books are being bought... For me. It's wierd. In Engineering it was survival of the fittest. If you couldn't make the cut you were out, no help being offered or anything. You were on your own.
Now, the school is really making sure everything is running smoothly. Classes are all input with us talking constructively more than the teacher. We are working extremely well in groups. Things are just... Well... Gelling. I was actually able to pay attention throughout the entire class yesterday.
And not because I just could. But because I wanted to. I haven't been able to say that in a very long time. I know I'm not going to be excited like this forever but I'm much more optimistic about school than I can ever remember being.
Things are looking bright for a change.
Studying for the CLP. Getting ready for school... Everything is flying around. Chores are lining up... Books are to be read. Notes are to be taken...
It's great to be back. =)
The last three weeks...Where do I start... The last couple of weeks have been a different kind of hell for me. Nothing really stressful, which is a GREAT thing, just extrememly busy. I actually at one point last week stopped and thought back to college where I would go from place to place and work on project to project stressing out over getting things done. Now, I'm realizing that instead of stressing out about getting things done, I'm just moving around twice as much. It's almost robotic unfortunately. Wake up. Head to work. Leave work to goto second job. Head over to parents house to work on third job. Come home and sleep. Wake up, etc... I'm not stressed at all but time is flying because I'm doing so much. What's worrying me is what am I going to do when Alex gets here??? :\
Workplace. I've taken on a ton of new resonsibilities. Which is a good thing. It kind of guarantees that I'll be keeping my job, instead of being laid off for outsourcing... I can't talk about anything for risk of what could happen, but all I know is that I'm starting to feel like a pet. One that is acknowledged with a treat for doing something good, but reprimanded for responding to situations that I think I should be. IE: A dog who is given a treat, but yelled at for giving paw while receiving the treat. There are days where I wonder why I am still here and days where I wouldn't want to work anywhere else. It's just difficult to work sometimes. But I can't say anymore...
Gaming. Final Fantasy Online is gone. I needed one group activity and an anrgy wife to make me quit. Almost three weeks ago now, at 8AM on Saturday morning, I let Totem sleep in while I went upstairs to play. I came back down at 3PM after I accomplished absolutely NOTHING. First of all, I didn't eat. I didn't even take a shower... :( Yeah, the addiction that I've been warned about is showing itself. But what bothers me more is that for 6 of the 7 hours I played, all I was doing was trying to get other people to go on a quest with other players that I had joined up with. When we finally had the 20 people we needed to go on this quest, we ran there, enterred the mine where the objective was... And got slaughtered in 3 minutes. 6 hours for 3 minutes. Yeah, I was let down BIG TIME and never logged in again. Now before anyone goes off and just calls me a stupid n00b, this quest had a level cap and we had a bunch of level 70+ members in our squad. All knew what was going to happen and knew how to play the game, but because of the level cap (IE: everyone's rank who was above 20 got dropped to 20), everyone just didn't survive... Well... at all. Plus, I really didn't believe at first that I played for 7 hours before even saying good morning to my wife. Bye Bye Final Fantasy Online. payday loans online
Enter Dungeon Lords. Not much of a switch unfortunately... Its not a massmog but it should have never been released to the public. IMHO it should still be in beta. Many of the ingame features that are talked about in the manual are not finished in the game. And the bad thing is that some of these features are missing from the character creation screen so right off the bat a bad first impression is set in (I felt really bad about buying this when I found out this "feature" wasn't a bug, and then it was intentionally left out and covered up by a game patch). I haven't gotten too far in the game, but normally when I get home and don't really have an urge to get on the computer and play it, for me, thats a bad sign...
Third Jobs. A lot of the webmaster jobs I am picking up are starting to pan out. Most are almost to completion and I have more clients coming in. Totem is really happy b/c she didn't believe me when I said we would be OK financially when she was not at work.
Another hobby. The model planes took off... And crashed... And burned. ;) Too much weight and too much speed does not bode well for styrofoam. So, I'm down one plane that is waiting to be flight tested. I think it's gonna be fun because Totem and I had a hell of a time killing my first plane. =)
Molly. She's growing up. Check out the pictures below. What I can't wait for is for her to realize Totem is pregnant. Shelby, my parent's dog, already knows. Every time we go over to my parents house, she get all protective and "snuggly" with Totem, sitting by her and keeping close at all times. ;) She did that to my aunt a couple of years ago when she was pregnant at a Christmas party. The odd, but good, thing is that she got protective of the baby too... She wouldn't let anyone but my aunt get close to my nephew. It was actually kind of neat to watch. Motherly instinct and all...
Alex. He's now around the 5lb mark according to the sonograms. Totem and I had our first birthing class yesterday evening. What kind of scared us was the fact that by the third of the five weeks of class, we'll be 37 weeks pregnant. Meaning, we might not have to go to the second last or the last class if Alex gets anxious. Totem is more beautiful than ever and it such an awesome feeling to have Alex not just kick back, but push. Miracles are amazing...
School. I got accepted into Graduate Management School so I am now an offical member of the Professional Masters of Business Administration Program, graduating class of 2008. I never thought I'd want to go back to school, but I really think I'm going to have to if I want to give the life I want to my wife and kid(s). Hopefully it should be a fun three years...
And thats it... Stuff after stuff after stuff. People are already warning me about not being able to do anything once my baby is born. Bring it on. =)
It pays to fight back...Literally. =) I signed up for the GMAT with the impression that my work would cover the cost (we have some nice benefits here). I got an email saying it was denied. So now I'm thinking I'm not only out $250 but if I cancel, I'll only get $80 back...
I was kind of bummed. I hadn't really commited to the "going back to college" thing yet and $250 is a lot of money for something I might end up doing... So I fought back. I wanted an exact definition of what they meant by "application fees". Since this test is required in order to apply, I considered and was told it would be covered. The request went through the local HR and made it all the way to Corporate HR and to the Vice President of the company. And guess what?
I won. =)
Approved and I will be reimbursed. [pimp] Niiiiice. [/pimp]
Another huge project...But this time I brought it upon myself. In a good way. ;) I recently signed up to take a training course to become Novell CLP Certified. To my surprise, the course I signed up for was a study at home training course with books and software and dvds. The one neat thing about is was that the course came with a copy of SuSE Linux Enterprise Server Version 9.
Guess who's starting over with their Linux box again? =)
Plus, it gives me an opportunity to give SuSE a shot. I've only used Red Hat, Debian, Gentoo, and Knoppix in the past...
Changes... Here and everywhere...Things have been happening over the last couple of weeks that have made me take a step back and look around... I've been very frustrated at the economy ever since I left college. I set myself up for failure and hit a brick wall before I realized it was coming. Now, with a baby on the way, with the first christmas as my own family, and with the very first tight, and I mean do we want gifts or to pay the bills, holiday season, things have taken on different meanings. And I mean everything.
For the first time, I can honestly say I do not know what I want to do with my life, job wise. The jobs that I want I know are just not available anymore because they are either taken or are non-existent. I even tossed up the possiblity of starting my own business, but the risk is too great and I don't believe in gambling a job in exchange for a family. So, with the help of Totem, I've settled on what we have (having a job) versus what we want (a job I don't have) and I am going to change my outlook. Pending I still have this job next fall, I will be going back to school of my MBA (one of the benefit os this job is they will pay for secondary education). Plus, the Management school has what they called a PMBA program that will let me keep my job full time, attend classes at night, and get my MBA after three years. Should I finish it, not only would I actually have a Masters degree, the MBA would open the door to a completely different market of job opportunities for me that can help me move on in life and better support my family.
Totem is on the up and up as well. She got a new job recently and already the management and owners are impressed with her. So much so that they are going to help her get back into school to get her teaching lics. Something that is NOT a company benefit. Whats even better is that her job (which is at a day care) has a benefit of free child care for the first child and they have no problem at all that she is pregnant. Big plus for us not only b/c it will help out trememdously in about 6 months, but b/c she has the backing of the day care. Yeah, I know it is against the law to descriminate, but you can't tell me that when someone sees a new applicant who is pregnant, that they do everything to avoid hiring them. It happens. I've seen it.
In terms of coding, designing, website, geek type world... Dad (or Pops - what he wants to be called by his grandchildren ;))and I are trying to get a web design business off of the ground. We've got a couple of low end jobs lined up that will hopefully just get our name out there, I can only hope this balloons into a good thing. I've slowed down on doing my usual computer stuff. I'm going to let a couple of the "wishful thinking" domains that I have expire because I never got them off of the ground, even after a year has gone by... Others are just waiting to be finished (I've got a PHP site coded and almost ready for release, I just don't have time to finish it). Other sites, like this one, I think I'm leaning towards a revamp. Spam has gotten so much out of control here that I'm just going to take down all of the public tracking tools and blocks and just let everyone and anyone do what they please. Well kind of, I'll still be in the background but it will be much more transparent to the user... Basically my goal on this website is at least to trim the fat. Get rid of some of the things that are (literally) slowing down the response time. Images that aren't needed. Public stats that, while useful to me, are just being filled with spam sites. Inactive links. Stuff like that... Hopefully I'll have that done soon enough...
On the homefront, the computer situation is getting slightly better. Parts have not come in yet, but planning stages have been changes. I've got a better handle on how I'm going to get my Linux box back to the way I want it, instead of just being back. My laptop has become my production machine and it is holding up pretty well. Ever since I've picked up the browser based online web gaming, the lack of video power hasn't really been an issue. Totems laptop is out on loan while her mother goes into and recovers from surgery. When we get it back, if I've got some extra cash, I plan on getting a wireless network going in the house so Totem does not have to go upstairs to get to her computer. I think she'll use her computer that much more if she can just connect to the Internet anywhere in the house...
And me. Well, I kind of liked venting a little bit so maybe I'll try to get back into the swing of things. It helps me relax a little bit... And its nice to keep track of things. Enough from me...
Good, in a bad creepy way...It feels good an all to be done, but now that everyone I know is going back to school, and I'm not, it feels kinda creepy... :\ Everyone's getting busy and stressed out already, even before school's started. And (not like I available 24/7) everyone seems to be busy.
I still can't figure out if its because I'm not going to school or because I will have been working full time for more than 3 months straight...
Meh...
This past weekend (and some of last week), event after event just kept coming. Final exams, work, job interviews, apartment finding, graduation, work again, 2 week notice, work... I'm pretty surprised at myself. Not too much stress...
Exams went better than I had hoped for on Thursday last week. Software Engineering was OK. No surprises, nots of writing, and lots of "can you convince the teacher that I know what I am talking about" questions. Everything was subjective. Good or bad, I don't know. I'll let you know after I get the grades. ;) My Operating Systems was almost an exact duplicate of the practice questions she had given us. So when she allowed us to bring in two sheets of notes, you can bet what myself and the rest of the class did. None of us thought she would make the questions so similar so we were all pretty happy after the exam...
Friday morning was work, followed by an afternoon at job interviews. Made some critical decisions that evening. One was to not take the apprenticeship that I was offered. Everyone I spoke too said it was not worth it. Let me put it this way... The program offerred two years of work along with certifications to boot (MCSE, MCDBA, CCNA, A+, NET+, Security+, yadda yadda yadda). The only hitch is that I had too pay for it. Yeah, pay. The student loans would have cost me 28K by the time I was done paying them. That's more than half of what I spent on college. While no one doubted that having certifications was a good thing, everyone said there were cheaper and easier ways to get them (IE: Not having to fly to another state for training, then be sent to another state for two years as an apprentice). Luckily for me, the interview went VERY well, and I won't have to fall back on the apprenticeship for work... :)
After all that, Totem and I went apartment hunting again. We had our minds on a place that was going to be nice, and a place that we'd be willing to live at for more than a year. First one we looked at had everything we wanted. Great price. LOTS of space. And is it right by everything we would ever need to get to, and in the middle of our parents (20 mins to each house instead of living near one and have a 40 min ride to the other). That got us pretty excited and started the weekend off right...
Saturday was all graduation. Lots of names. Lots of sitting. Glad it is done. Had a nice dinner with my family and Totems. Congrats to you too, Starfire!
Mothers Day was fun. We worked in the morning (kind of a gift to Totem's Mom who normally works, we coverred her morning shift). Spent the rest of the day with my parents. Spring cleaning actually was good this year. We got a lot done. Mom won $100 on a lottery ticket. She was happy. ;) Dad treated us all to dinner. First time in a while that Mom and Dad had both of their sons and their significant others at one place.
This morning was work again. Handed in my two week notice. Tonite, I think I'll be playing on my computer since I don't have any school work to do (YESSSS!!!). If I'm lucky, I'm gonna see if I can get Gentoo up and running on my laptop. I downloaded all the files I needed when I was at my parents house so hopefully I won't have to try and get a PPP connection up...
Anyway, things are still looking up. For a change...
Home stretch...Classes are over. All... classes... are... over... Hmmm... I thought it would feel different than this. Oh well...
Only studying for finals left... Feeling pretty good about the year (past and upcoming). Feeling better knowing the end of schooling and beginning of "life" is near . Better be careful, all your base will belong to me. 8) I can at least look forward to the summer and getting a bunch of my projects finished... I'll finally have to time to get them done.
7 Days and counting until no more classes...
I'm getting giddy. ;)
More woes for Computer Engineers...The outsourcing is hurting people who are even close to finishing... Maybe this will backfire and create a demand for jobs in the US because of the lack of skilled employees??? Maybe?
Students shun Computer Sciences
Or is it just because we aren't being taught well enough...
Schools not up to snuff
No wonder they called this class the hardest int he department... ::groan::
Who cares... LAN party tonite!!! Fragging does wonders for a stressed mind. Theres nothing better than blowing stuff up with a BFG9000, RailGun, Rocket Launcher, and Chainsaw on a friday night. ::evil grin:: Have you ever blown stuff up with a chainsaw??? :p
Yup. Its back. Hell week(s). I forgot about a couple of assignments last night. I got them finished, though. I just had to shift my work schedule. Wednesday is the due date for my Soft Eng project, the first phase. Then I have my first phase of my OS project due on Friday. Hopefully the LAN party that night will let me "vent" some of the pressure. (I'm still waiting to have a frag fest at one of those...) Next week comes two exams. Followed the week after that which is a project and exam in the same week...
Yippee!!!
Where have you been?Wow. It's been a really long time since I have written something... :\
These past couple of days haven't been hell, but they sure have been busy. Friday and Saturday were pretty much uneventful. I had to go to work for most of each day. Surfed and coded and usual...
Sunday was a little busier. The day started by my actually blowing my windoze box away. And, as expected, I did forget to back some minor stuff up. (It happens to me every time.) I lost all my email account settings and mail filters... At least I managed to save the emails... :p But as that chugged along, something else popped up. Most of my software and things I needed weren't at my house anymore. They're in boxes. I ended up downloading mostly new drivers and software from the Internet so it wasn't a completely bad thing. What was bad was not having my Quicken CD with me. When your normal routine is to come home and check your finances and email, and suddenly I couldn't do that, everything becomes really weird. I was so out of place. At one point I was just sitting in my chair trying to think of what I could do next (in terms of reinstalls) and Totem walked in asking what was wrong. She said I looked so confused and lost... ;)
Needless to say, the computer is feeling healthier... Software installs are going slow but I've got all my data, email, and financial stuff back up and running so all is well. Unfortunately, on Sunday, not everything went well.
We spent the rest of the afternoon packing up stuff and moving it over the new place. We then got news that Jen's (step) Uncle had died. Now her grandmother has lost her husband and son within two years. Just as she was starting to be able to cope with the loss of her husband, her son dies. She is a wreck, the poor woman. I hope everything turns out as good as can be expected in the end...
Monday. Totem's first day of classes this semester and our first day to attempt car pooling. ::fake sarcastic laugh:: It was also the first day of really really bad snow in the area. Driving was a pain in the a$$. It should have taken me about 45 minutes to get her to school and then get to work. It took an hour and 45 minutes... What a way to start a Monday.
But, the day went off without a hitch for either of us. Work kept me busy all morning and school was nice too. I'm really getting used to this 3 days of school stuff. Totem's classes went well too. She was glad to be back with a bunch of her friends.
Tuesday was even worse than Monday, in terms of weather. Driving was horrible ALL day. Snow everywhere, and I mean everywhere! Another couple of hours drive for us in the morning. The day was normal. Work, meh... School was OK for Totem. We had dinner at a local sports bar (kinda a back to usual schedule treat type thing) and will never be going back there again... Not the worst $30 we have ever spent on dinner. There just wasn't much to quantity and Totem's chicken was drying than cardboard...
I got myself registerred for Tuxedos for the wedding. Its kind of a nice feeling to get that out of the way... Just one step closer I guess...
Wednesday morning. This morning. BAH! 2 hours of driving and I was still late for my class... All the roads were moving slower than usual. Wierd thing was that the side roads were going faster than the thruways... :) That's the only reason I was extremely late to class. I took all side roads to campus instead of the thruway after I dropped Totem off...
Now I'm just sitting here in a computer lab waiting for my next class... Creative Nomads (the devices, that play mp3's, not creative people that move from place to place, even though I qualify as one) are so nice... 8)
To paraphrase one of my professors:
"If you are taking this class and Operating Systems this semester, drop this class. If you're a final semester Senior, do your best."
In other words, BEND OVER BABY!!! WE'RE GONNA HAVE FUN TONITE!!!
New Semester...The first day of the new semester. I can definately tell it is here. I was an hour and a half late to work because my truck got stuck in the snow. Some mice were stolen at work so now I have to go through and re-lock down every computer I've been securing over the last week. I'm being blamed for problems with faculty systems that I did not do (and my boss knows that I did not do and is defending me).
Today is a really good day. And finally, finally, I'm not bummed about it. :) Honestly, I'm pretty excited to be going back to classes. This semester is the "lightest", and hopefully last, semester I've ever had. Operating Systems, Networking Concepts, and Software Engineering are all I have. These are far from blow off courses, most compared to hell (2 of the 3). But the all sound very interesting. Who knows, I'll be sure to be writing later. I've got my first class in 30 mins...
A good thing that did happen was news of my Probability grade. I managed to pass the course with a C so now I can (so far) go along with my light semester next semester in terms of course load. This is gonna be a big thing for me because it will klet me focus more time on the toughest course I have to take at college, Operating Systems.
Plus, I won't have to be out of my house 18 hours a day next semester either. Things are looking up...
I just finished my last exam yesterday. They were all rough but I got through them... It's nice to not have to worry about homework and stuff for at least a couple of weeks... I haven't gotten all my grades back yet. The upside is that the one class that I was worrying about having to retake (because it would mean I would have to stay another semester b/c it is only offerred in the fall) I don't have to worry about. I passed it. :) The downside is that unless there is a really steep curve in my probability class, I will probably (no pun) have to retake it next semester... :(
Oh well. Time to focus on re-doing my windoze box and not ignoring my blogs anymore...
Another one down... Not so nicely this time, though. I was more confident about this class than I was for any others but I feel really bad after walking out of this exam...
::starts praying for a good curve::
2 more...
22 hours of staring at the windowed environment known as X, remotely and locally, at school and at home, I'm finished. Took me awhile to actually complete my database project but that is much better than I had anticipated... I'm happy which is a plus too. :) Now to relax for the first time in a week...
Well, I just figured out why my databases course has been so rough this semester... This is the first semester that my teacher has ever taught an undergraduate course. :( No wonder we've only gotten one project all year and had to listen to hour and a half lectures on theory...
My one hope now is that he grades like he does in graduate school...
I met with my Probability teacher for a third and final time tonite. If I had to sum up what happened, I would call it a standstill... I'm gracious, though, because he was willing to stay after 5PM to work with me...
I don't want to really discuss it all so I'm just gonna bring up some key phrases he used...
"You're plugging and chugging again..."
"We need everyone to be big boys and girls."
"Why are you taking this course, you should have dropped it long ago."
"It's odd how you're getting the difficult material but not the easy stuff."
"Did you take mechanics yet? ... Ouch, thats gonna hurt."
I'm no where near as mad as I was last time, but I also wans't just a little quiet student this time. I made my case known and argued every point. He wanted to repeatedly tell me that I need to do something about spending more time on my work otherwise I wasn't going to make it. I agreed that I needed more time, but if I wasn't going to make it, then why am I a Senior in the hardest major in my college???
Either way, I don't have as heavy of a chip on my shoulder any more. But I'm not going back to him. If I need help anymore, I'm gonna take it up with the TA's...
Strike 2...Denial, loss of hope, frustration... Anger.
I'm starting to get a little afraid about my grades. Things are not going too well in a bunch of my classes so I'm buckling down and trying to study more. But for Probability, there are just some things that I couldn't get. So, I got the strength to go see my teacher again for help. The guy who told me I think in the worst possible way for Probability. So I sit down and say to him I need help with some concepts from Chapter 4 (since we are currently on Chapter 5). I start to ask some questions and he begins replying (he did it 2 times) with, "I don't have enough time to give you another lecture."
THEN WHY THE FSCK ARE YOU HAVING OFFICE HOURS IF YOU DONT WANT TO HELP STUDENTS!?!?!?!? I ignored him and went on...
I tried to get him to explain the concepts and little better than he had done in lecture while making it seem like I knew my stuff. To me, I think he wasn't going to try if it seemd to him that I was already going to fail the course. I didn't last long, but he found me out from another angle that I was lost. Basically he was explaining a problem that I was stuck on and then leaded back in his chair and asked what did I do while I was taking mechanics??? I gave him a blank look and then he realized. He then asked what major I was and when I told him Computer Engineering he kinda said, "Oh..." and started a different approach...
I DONT THINK I'M EVER GOING TO STOP GETTING PISSED OFF AT TEACHERS WHO FRIGGIN' ASSUME EVERYTHING ABOUT THEIR STUDENTS! It's really annoying that I have to bust my a$$ through this class because he designed it around the courses that a mechanical or industrial engineer would take...
When does the time come when it is OK to say fsck it to everything?
If there is one (negative) thing that I am going to take out of college with me, it is going to be all the assumptions that all the professors and teaching assistants make about the students taking their classes... Over the past month, almost all of my professors/TA's have made assumptions about the students that in one way or another, mocked me.
The first was in my probability class. He was so honored at the high grades for the first exam in his class. He went on about the people who are in class that day (1/2 of the class showed) must have been the ones who did great on the exam and those people that we skipping were suffering and the exams grades showed it. I've missed one class and I was there that day and I failed his exam.
My statics teacher this morning went on about how this class is a base for everyone and that the sophomores should really learn the material because they will use it throughout their career. He then went on to say that there are some seniors in the class (I am a senior) who prove that the material is important (to be explained). He was talking about how the sophomores who do well are going to be fine the rest of their college career. He then said that the seniors that were in the classroom were the ones who were failing and could not "cut it" with engineering. The only reason I'm retaking the class was because he shoved 15 weeks of material down my throat in a 6 week summer class. I didn't even fail it. I'm taking it again to raise my grade. I'm still an engineer unlike the other 400 students who have dropped the major since my freshmen year. Who's not cutting it?
And now my databases TA. I love it when professors/TA tell you how bad the grading is going, the proceed to go over the exam and show you the solutions, only to promise that you will get your grade back in a week. Why not make it hurt a littel more after taking an impossible exam... To top that off, one student decided to ask if so and so question was really fair. The response he got was that in the workplace you must be a master at these skills. I rebutted saying that in the workplace we at least have a chance to test our code and fix bugs. We were being tested on a language that we have had no coding experience with. His response... Things are taught differently in China and that he thinks students in America are struggling because they have to work while they attend school. That just flat pissed me off... He then went on to say that Computer Scientists must know the background of everything they code because they are just that, scientists. He must not realize that this course is also taken by Computer Engineers, I thought and found out a couple of second later. "Engineers I guess really only have to work with experience, not background, so this would be fine for them, but you as scientists need to go deeper and understand the ideas behind the methods." (Not exactly, but that is much more to the point than what he said.) I wanted to stand up and say, "You have engineers in your class. Why are you treating us all as Computer Scientists?" as well as some choice words. I'd go higher and complain to the professor about him if the professor was not a native Chinese person as well...
I can't even go the department heads of any of these classes because the professors that are saying these things have been here for more than 10 years and will not even blink when they hear that one student is complaining about them... It's all useless. I'm hoping my degree is not as well because right now it is just like all the other professors. My degree is an assumption at this moment...
::drops head and walks away::
I just met with my Probability professor to discuss by exam (which I bombed) and I don't feel too good... Mentally and physically...
I've never gone to a teacher for help before only to come out feeling worse than when I went in. He made me sick, literally. But don't get me wrong, it's not like he was trying to, and he was being very sympathetic. He just overwhelmed me with the material and really kept shoving down my throat that if I couldn't make it on the first exam, I'm in for an extremely rough trip on the second and final. One thing after the other, he kept drilling me on material on class and in his notes. Formulas left and right. He kept asking my if I ever wondered why he spent so much time on X subect... :\ When we were finished with each problem and I said I don't understand what he meant, he said that's why you got the problem wrong... How reassuring...
What's worse is that for the problems that we went over, I explained to him exactly what I was thinking and doing for it. His response, "That is the worst possible way you can problem solve in this class." THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I KNOW HOW TO PROBLEM SOLVE!!!
I'm so fscked... :(
I really wish my University would hire TA's that are competent AND can teach. Not one or the other... ::grumble:: >:(
And I mean for the Engineering and Computer Science departments so don't chop my head off Raindancer. ;)
This day is just dragging on... First the cigarette induced headache/nausea. Now my recitation got cancelled. And I have no homework to do... I should have brought a book...
I finished the SWE last night after Dreamweaver templates kept me at bay for two days. The template is stored in a different directory than the site and Dreamweaver is supposed to be able to modify all the links to their correct locations when you make a new page based on the template. If the template is setup to use root site relative links, things kinda don't work. After I got that fixed, I had the new website done in a couple of hours.
After a month and a half of asking people to ask for me, so I could gain access to the SWE website, and getting no where by doing that, I went yesterday and asked myself...
I got access within an hour. :\ I guess I just knew who to ask and where to go... Last night I finished up all the graphics and basically did all the hard stuff for the site. Tonight I will be adding the content and should have a working version up for the club by the end of the weekend.
The strange thing was how easy it was for everyone to give me access. You would think there would have been security checks or something (or at least I hope there was). I managed to gain another webspace for the club, so now we actually have two sites, but on just forwards to the other. I also went unchecked, I am pretty sure, when I was given access to the main server. I just went into the sys admin's office. I told her who I was and what I needed. An hour later I got it. :\ I really hope they checked SOMETHING. I could have just walked in and probably said I was involved in any club and been given access... Though, everything is linked to a universty given username so it probably wouldn't happen (because of the consequences that would come about)...
Still, it seemed pretty insecure to me...
So far things are going well with the final fall semester of my college life. Classes are moving along. Some homework has been assigned but most of the classes are waiting until next week to get into full gear of things...
The only bad thing that has happened so far was me getting sick yesterday. I was lucky enough to have all the classes cancelled for that day so I didn't miss any school but I did leave work early... I'm feeling a little better today, but I haven't eaten anything major yet. Wierd thing is that I'm not hungry either... Hmmm...
On the up side I didn't gain any weight on my trip. THat really surprised me because of all the junk food and pizza I ate... Also my running/walking is getting better. It is amazing what a new pair of shoes can do! :) I don't have the pain in my knees anymore because of them! I can do a full lap and only be winded. What I think is really awesome is that I am stopping running and switching to walking because I'm out of breath, not because I am in pain... Either way, I'm still doing my ten laps (with about 3-4 running) and I'm feeling really good about myself. I hope these pounds keep coming off. I've got 11 more months to lose 55 pounds...
My last summer class was today. Glad it is over. It wasn't a bad class, it's just a feeling that I am one step closer to finsihing my degree. All my gen eds are now done and only my major courses are left (IE: Computer Engineering courses).
Now I have a week and a half off to relax. Then on Wed of next next week I'm heading down to see my brother in Texas at his Air Force Base. Me, Totem, and my Mom are attending his Boot Camp graduation ceremony down there. I'm really excited about going. I guess he said one of my letters made him tear up (in a good way). That made me feel awesome. I can wait to get down there!
I've been in a lot of classes where a couple of students probably knew more about the subject than the teacher did. That's fine by me. More power to them... But when you have to make it known that you know more, it gets really annoying...
There was a student in my Philosophy class today that just wouldn't stop talking. We've been talking about virtues from Aristotle's and Plato's view. The teacher started talking about one thing, and this kid wouldn't stop rebutting him with references about other philosophers we haven't even learned about. The teacher said something, he said something back. It went on for twenty minutes. I wanted to tell the guy to just shut up. This is only a 101 class. Not a graduate level class...
Sheesh...
Well I didn't fail Statics, I got a D... :\ So he did some curving even though he said he wasn't going to...
Why is a D bad??? Because in my department you have to retake any course that you get less than a C- on... Either way, I'm not angry that I have to retake the class because I will be taking it with Smilemoreb so I'll have someone to walk through hell with me this time... ;)
The reason I'm kinda bummed about all of this is not because I have to retake it, or that it was an impossible course, or that the same teacher is teaching it in the fall, or that I'm retaking a course that I DIDN'T FAIL... It's that I paid $700 bucks to take this class over the summer. I don't think I got anything out of it except knowing what the exams are going to be like in the fall...
On the same trend, I got an email yesterday saying that they are raising the tuition at school by $1000 in the fall. Yeah for being poor!!!
On the upside, I do have all the pictures of the homework solutions. So that should make the studying ahead in the fall a little easier and it should make some of the homework simpler to solve (he won't be assigning the same homeworks so don't call me a cheater, and if he does it will be 20-30 more problems per chapter on top of the 10 he gave us so I don't have nearly all of the solutions). That combined with Smilemoreb's (similar) experience of walking through hell alone we should be a pretty good team in the fall...
I took the final exam last night. Pain in the a$$. Got the grade already. I got a 51 and the class average was 50...
That puts the overall statics in a pretty bad situation for the teacher. The class average for the entire course was a 53 or a D by what he said in the syllabus. My average was a 47 or an F. If he sticks to his guns, I'll be taking the course again in the fall (with him unfortunately or fortunately, I don't know). If he decides to be nice I just might walk away with a C- or even a C... It might be a D, though, which will probably kill my tech GPA and I'll have to retake it again... I think I'd have to because of department policy (something about them not counting ANYTHING below a C-)...
I won't find out for a couple of days until he posts the final grades on the University's computer systems...
I can only hope... :?
I got my grade for Statics exam early (because the grades are posted online). I MAJORLY bombed the exam. I'm really bummed because I was confident too... Here's the thing (and possible bright point). Since he is not curving the course, most of the class failed too. The class average was a 49. His syllabus says anything below a 50 is failing...
I'm probably asking for too much, but who knows, he may change it seeing how bad we all did... I can keep my fingers crossed right?
Even if he does, I don't know if it will help me. If a 50 becomes a C, I'll probably get a C- or a D+ for the grade... ::Heavy Sigh::
Long weekend...This weekend was kinda longer than normal, but not necessarily in a bad way... I kinda hit on every topic I normally think/write/talk about...
Friday was OK. Work was kinda slow. Had a review session for my Statics test tonite (Monday). I'm getting nervous about that. Totem showed up after I got out and she came back to work with me since I took an hour off to goto the review session. We had dinner and general "time together" time. It was nice.
I ended up sleeping in until noon on Saturday; I was woken up by Totem vacuuming (sp). She was a little upset I slept in that late, but when you are playing a game until three in the morning, you're kinda tired when you get up. ;) We then went over to her mom's house and I got to do my lawn mowing again. Don't ask why, but I like the time alone to think. Call me Forrest Gump but I think it's kinda peaceful when you have the mower's engine drowing out all other noise and can just wonder about stuff. The weather was not as nice, just cloudy (YAY! No sunburn!!!). We stuck around until late night when we headed over to my parent's house...
I bought the Animatrix earlier this week and really enjoyed it. Getting a LOT of the questions answerred about the Matrix in general made the movie/9 anime cartoons worth it. Plus they were really good quality and had great depth. My opinion: If you liked the movie Heavy Metal, you'll like the animation in the Animatrix. You might not understand the it, but you'll like it. ;)
That brings me back to my parents. I liked to so much that I watched it with my Dad. Totem and my Mom were also there, but easily turned off by the whole concept. The general consensus: You have to be on drugs to understand it. :) Maybe. :p It's just really deep. Mom and Totem were LOST the whole time. Dad didn't get most of it but he said he enjoyed one of the 9 cartoons (the Square remake ripped from Final Fantasy).
So I'm the only looney one. Who cares? 8-)
Sunday was a little more rough. It does not help that I stayed up until 5AM playing Morrowind. The only reason I went to bed was because I knew if I didn't at that time, I wouldn't at all... We had to take the cats back. Turns out that the family that took them, has a baby that is allergic to cats... :( So Totem did something I didn't agree with, but worked out in the end. They're new home, Totem's parent's garage. I thought they were gonna FLIP, but ended up being much more receptive than I had thought. So now she gets to see them more often, still gets to take care of them, and I get my option of making them outdoor cats... I'm still very appreciate of all the people of offerred to help me out with them, but I wasn't gonna ask everyone again after I just told them we found a home... Only time will tell how long they will last there...
Last night I devoted to studying. Two hours and I had only gotten through half of the Statics homework problem solutions I have... I didn't even get time to study for my Com 101 exam this morning, which went OK I hope... I've got a couple of hours before the exam tonite, so I should be able to wrap them up and pray for the best... Knowing my luck, I'll be bummed out all the way back home when it's over. But I'm trying to keep my hopes up. Pending no brain farts. ;)
I really really really really HATE statics... >:(
I haven't wanted to give up this bad ever since I took Physics in freshman year. It's the same crap too! A single problem taking 2 hours and many pages to solve. All from about a paragraph of information out of the book and just MAYBE an example on something not even remotely related. And the notes are crap when it comes to applying them to homework (but they are good for the lectures, though).
I love how these authors think we learn by osmosis. Of course it does not help that the class is taught the way it is (read below about the length of the class). The notes make sense. The teacher makes sense. Everything makes sense BUT the damned homework...
I'm so frustrated about all of this I'm actually hurting. Really... My back kills right now and I'm tense all over. :(
The only bright (and by bright I mean bearly able to see the light, but there is light there) side of all of this is that it will be over in 3 weeks. Since its a summer course, it's only 6 weeks long... Instead of the normal 13 or 14 (I think) week period. That's probably why I'm so stressed out too... We do a chapter ever lecture. So two chapters a week. About 8 hours of homework per lecture... So Monday's suck b/c thats only two days to do the homework before the next lecture...
I just wanna go home right now...
I think I need more sleep. I just got all the way to school and as I got out of the car...
I realized that I left my backpack at home... :\
Figures that the first day I bring a lunch I forget my backback... ;)
I had to meet with my counselor today to make sure that I was off of probation now that my GPA is much higher... All in all, it was a pretty informative meeting and went well...
I first wanted to throw something at her that I have been thinking about for a long time, double majoring. I looked into the details of majoring in Computer Engineering and Computer Science. It turns out that if you are a Computer Engineer, there are only three courses that you have to take (according to my university's degree auditing program thingy) to become a major in Computer Science as well. It'd be nice with two B.S. degrees. So I asked her about it. Good news is that there is actually only one course, ONE SINGLE COURSE, that a Computer Engineer would have to take in order to become a Computer Science major. It turns out that since I would have completed the Gen Eds for Comp Eng, I don't have to worry about the Gen Eds for Comp Sci, including the second language requirement. I also found out that one of the courses I have taken is an equivalent to the one CS required. (I knew it was, but I only thought the credit could be used in one direction, not back and forth). So one course, and I'm a Computer Science major.
Well, that's what I thought until she told me about a bs (not the type of degree here) requirement my college has. Because of this little loophole of only being one course different between the two degrees, my university does not allow a double major with Computer Engineering and Computer Science. What they do allow is a Double Degree...
And here's how it works. I would need to satisfy the 30 credit hour residency requirement twice, once for each degree. So bascially all I would have to do is take and additional 27 credit hours (I have the other three from other extra classes I took) and I could have the second degree. Here's the bs part... It does not matter what courses I take to reach those additional 27 credit hours. I could take 27 credits in art, physics, a language, or even BASKETWEAVING (she actually said this). All I'd have to do is come back for a year and force myself to take 101 (or any of the above) classes everywhere and I could get the CS degree... We both thought this was kind of pathetic, but on the other hand, it's not worth the tuition money. I'll explain below.
Since the Comp Eng degree is much harder (and I believe it it the hardest major in the entire University, there are statistics somewhere that prove this), and I know that companies do come back to the school and comment on how good/bad the students are. So I asked if companies are noticing the difference between the Comp Sci students and the Comp Eng students. She said no. :( Because of the economy being so bad as it is, companies are just looking for the B.S. in a degree (IE: B.S. is better than a B.A.). They can't really tell the difference between the Eng students and the Sci students. They just know that they are both good...
Great, now the degree I worked my a$$ off to get is worth the same as someone who took 20+ credit hours less than me and does not know a thing about circuits... >:( Yippee...
So the cookie crumbled. Oh well...
But the day didn't all go bad. I'm am officially off of probation. And as it turns out, I'm doing too well with my schedule. Taking all the courses that I had planned to have taken in the fall would only leave me with two courses to take in the Spring. While all and good, I need at least one more course to make full-time student status (stupid financial aid details). So the plus of all of this is that instead of one heavy semester (17 credits) and one light semester (12 credits) next year, I get two light semesters of 13 and 12 credit hours each... Not bad. :)
So outside of being told that maybe I should have been a Computer Science major instead of a Computer Engineering major because of the lighter course load and better grades I could have received (and because businesses don't know the difference nowadays), I had a pretty good day.
Now off to clean the old apartment for inspection from the building manager...
Yup. I have to rearrange my schedule for a one credit class... ::grumble:: I thought I was going to have an easy going fall... Now my work schedule is royally fscked up. I've got tons of gaps between classes. I don't even know if I'll have time to work between them... Grr...
::sigh::
Yeah I know I didn't write anything all weekend, but it was kinda a long blah weekend. Nothing good or bad that I really want to write about...
I just found out that I may have to redo my ENTIRE fall schedule over a single one credit class that I have to take as a Senior and that is ONLY offerred in the fall...
Man... :\
An article from NY Times is talking about the lack of computer science majors in college when compared to a couple of years ago...
The plus is that it means only the people who are in the major for computers, and not for money, are staying around. The negative is that this matches the same trend as the high-tech fields in the stock market...
Lots of people I'm able to relate to are commenting here...
The more I think of how I can't take this crap anymore, Totem reminds me that I'm not far from the end of the tunnel...
I started thinking about this when I (finally) finished my Statics homework. I'm beyond stressed out. She reminded me that it comes with the territory. I'm an Engineer. Duh! This is gonna happen. She reminded me that even though I'm taking summer classes, most of them are to make life a little easier in the future. I only have to take 1 course over this summer if I want to graduate on time. But by taking an additional two gen eds, I've freed up 6 credit hours during my last semester. That's good for two things. First, if I fail or have to retake any course from this summer or in the fall, I now have an open slot and will still be able to graduate on time. Second, if that does not happen, I will only be taking three courses that semester. While they won't be easy classes, my load will be sgnificantly less than usual (IE: 12 credits instead on 19)...
So I just have to bite my tongue, suck it up, and push forward because I'm almost out. Hopefully if I just keep reminding myself that, life should be a little easier. Thanks for being there Totem!
Last night was good and not so good...
The teacher was actually able to hold my attention for the three hour class. It's amazing because A.) it was three hours and B.) it's a math/physics type class...
But here is the tough part, not bad but tough. We do a full chapter each lecture. There are homework assignments every class. (Four hours of work on the Monday lecture and eight hours of work for the wednesday lecture because of the break before the next class.)
Here is the bad part. I've heard this class kills people. Strangers I sat next to have taken the class before. Others heard the same rumors that I have heard. With all that said, This teacher does NOT curve... :(
Grades are set. 40% each for two exams and 20% for homeworks. He said he has been teaching this course for 17+ years and has had to fail 15 students one year. On the other hand, he said he had a year where 40 students got A's... So he will not resort to curving if the class average is failing. We are on our own...
I'm getting nervous... :\
I just got out of my first summer class and I think its going to be a VERY bumpy road over the next few weeks...
First of all, the teacher is just a TA (or a graduate student without a Master's degree yet). Secondly, she complained about the class the whole time and was more interested in socializing than teaching. She walked in and her first comment was about how this schedule sucked (8AM class) and that she was tired. Then during the class she started copmplaining that the room was too hot and tht she had to take off her sweater because she sweats too much. :\ Then she went into braggin about her MTV internship and that she got to be with Carson Daly. At which point all the girls in the class (about 60% girls in class) let out a gasp, literally. Then when someone brought up the Matrix Reloaded, which I'll explain later, she said the movie sucked and the only reason to go see it was to see Keanu Reeves... To top all of that, she said she is moving to DC on July 1. Great, so now we know you don't really give a crap and are just here because you need the money...
OK. So she's trying to come down to our level to try and make the class a little more casual. I'll give her that. But damnit woman, don't go that low! Gawd, you just stooped below frosh level! FEH!
She does not even want to teach. Here's why. I asked a question about her syllabus. A simple question of whether or not we are allowed to turn in more than one homework assignment per chapter. Her response: "It's to early for me to think. Can you try that again?" Here's another one. One part of the syllabus says our term paper is worth 50 points and another part says it is worth 75 points. I asked which one was right. She told me I shouldn't be concerned with little "stupid" (she actually said that) typo's in her syllabus. First of all, 50 or 75 points mean a lot when the total points for the semester is 220. Second, if you are going to take points off of our paper because of "typos" (and it says she will) then why can't you write a syllabus properly???
Can you tell I'm frustrated?
Then to top all that off, she did the thing that all gen-ed teachers do, a sign that this class is going to suck. She made us go around the room and introduce ourselves. She even said she hated doing it when she was an undergrad but wanted to return the favor now that she could. Grr. This is where the Matrix ws brought up because on of the questions we had to answer was "What was the last CD you bought?" (OMFG.) When people couldn't answer that, they had to say something else... So movies and DVD's came in...
On the hopefully-plus-maybe-this-will-be-a-blow-off-class side. One student already answered the teacher's question with "bull$hit" (when asked what are we going to get out of this class). The other is that I am one of two students that are a senior and I am one of two students that are in odd majors. By odd, I mean something other than Communication, Theater, or Undecided. So two of us (Seniors) may be in for a cake walk. And two of us Non-Communication (the other is a Business major) degrees may be in for a cake walk. Hopefully those odd's will hold up...
Did I mention that this class is Mondy through Friday at 8AM for 6 weeks? Ungghhhh... :\ I just can't wait for my Statics class tonite. :(
Grades don't officially come out until Monday, but since all my grades have been posted, I got an early look.
I did much better this semester that I had anticipated. Two of the classes I thought I was going to fail, I got C's in. Another two classes I got A's in. And one of those was a MAth class (a first for me).
So now I'm not on probation, and my GPA rose slightly... I'm still in the program thank god. Now its time to get ready for the summer classes I have to take... :\
I just got my first A in a four credit class ever in college. WOHOO!!!
Wierd thing is that I got it in a Math class that I have taken two times before, resigning the first and getting a D+ the second time.
Good thing my university has a policy that the second time erases the first official grade (the D+)...
WOHOO!!! YIPPEE!!! ::excited dancing:: I think that brought my semester grade up .5 points... Kewl... :)
Mood change...I was having a good day, and then like a light switch... Downhill I go...
I feel so alone. I've got everyone by me. Totem. My family. Her family. But I feel so lonely and depressed...
I want these damned finals to be over with so I can figure out if this is from all the friggin stress of school or if it is something else...
Last project (if you even want to consider it a project b/c of the crappy job I did) was just turned in... My classes are over. All that remains of this semester is an exam this Saturday morning and two exams next thursday...
*sigh of relief*
On a side note, Totem and I are doing MUCH better. Her sister, Starfire, came over last night and we all talked for a couple of hours. It was nice to get in touch with her again. Totem's parents are still coping with the whole situation, but aren't in a much better state than they were when it happened...
I'm guessing that this is going to be another situation of "Time heals all wounds..."
I've been working since 3:00 on this signals project... It's now 9:00. I'm not even finished with the FIRST question...
I REALLY HATE SIGNALS...
Grr....
The stress is beginning to go away... Two of my classes are completely over. Another two are just waiting on a final exam. And my last class, I have to submit a design project on Monday...
This has been the week from hell... I just wish I had time to recover and relax... But I don't because I'm doing something for the first time in my life this summer...
SUMMER SCHOOL!!! Fun wow... :\
Three major projects (all worth 10% or more in my final average for each class, 3 classes), 2 exams. Not to mention it's almost impossible to get onto a computer anywhere on campus anymore because everyone is craming...
Bah, I hate the end of the semester...
I'm starting to really hate math teachers... I just took another test for my Linear algebra class. You'd figure that the test would focus on all the material covered in the two chapters that the test was for. Nope. He makes 60% of the exam come from one section out of both the chapters. Even better is that 15% of the exam only came from one of the chapters...
Sometimes I just wanna go up there and say wake up or something...
But, then again, on a hopefully possibly wishfully good note, he did the same crap on the last exam. I thought I did really bad... But ended up getting an A because the class did so much worse than me... (On that exam, anything higher than a 70 was an A...)
Crosses fingers...
I've probably said this before, but I'm gonna say it again...
I should have gone to a private college because there, the professors maybe would give a fsck about me and my career...
At my current public college I am nothing more than a number. And while some professors really do care about their students, most are there not to teach, but to do research. I've got a couple of teachers that are so bad, I can almost guarentee you that they have brought in over $100,000 to the engineering school and that is the only reason why they are still there...
It gets really annoying now that I am finally in specialized courses for my major. I'm mean these schmucks, while they do know their stuff, can't convey any of it to their students. And the administration won't do anything about it because said teacher just bought them new office furniture with a recent grant...
I wish I would have seen this coming freshman year... Now I'm too far in to get out... :\
It took me only 5 minutes to get in this year and register classes... Very nice.
I got all the classes I wanted so next year in the fall I will be having three days weekends... No class or work on Friday! YAY!!! Only downside is that Mon - Thurs will be 12 hour days, but I figured since I'm doing that right now all 5 days of the week, that's got to be better. ;)
Databases...I just found out that Robowoman is gonna be in my database concepts course in the fall. I get to take the course with someone I know... YAHOO!!!
I'm right you're wrong...Sometimes I don't understand why people need to force their opinions on you. I'm all for expressing your opinions and feelings but when you belittle the other party, it's not the same...
On the other hand, why are there people out there that will take the abuse and not fight back because they want to avoid a fight, even if it means that they will be hurt in the end...
Long story, I don't want to talk about it because I will get more depressed... :(
[Begin Transmission]
New Project: Operation Take Over Capen Printers
Aggressive/Proactive Approach: Hack into servers. Installed trojan that will continuously print 1000 page documents during heavy hours of operation... Rub in fact that they are educational manuals and I need them.
Neutral/Fail Approach: Use Unix printers for large documents because most users do not know how / do not want to / are to stupid to use the Unix printers... Do not argue with other users because you know that you are not printing useless items and that they do have legitimate educational purposes.
Defensive/Give In Approach: Hack into servers. Install trojan that gives resident jacka$$ full access to printer queue that way he will never interfere with printing again... Kiss jacka$$' a$$ and appologize profusly for printing out needed things...
[End Transmission]
Summer Classes...On a completely different topic, it looks like I am going to be doing a hefty amount of coding over the summer for the Independent Study that I am taking my college...
I'll be designing a web-based tutorial on TCP/IP with Java applets to better explain the topics in each section of the tutorial. So not only do I get to expand on the Java I already know and apply it to applets, I get to teach myself the core of TCP/IP (something I've wanted to learn for a LONG time because of my interest in networking and firewalls) and how it is used in software interfacing and obviously the Internet.
If all goes well, the teacher would acutally use this tutorial in one of his graduate level courses. Imagine that, an undergraduate writing a manual for graduate students to use. How kewl is that!!! =)
I had a math exam two weeks ago before Spring break. I didn't finish and I thought I got most of my answers wrong so I was gearing up for a pretty bad grade when I came to class today. I didn't bother me that much because I got an A on my first exam and that would mean if I got a F, I'd have pretty much a C and C's aren't bad in my book...
So I get my exam back. 77 out of 100. What's so awesome about that? On this exam, the curve turned out to be that if you got between a 70 and a 100, you got an A on the test.
THAT MAKES TWO A'S IN A ROW AND NOW 50% OF MY LINEAR ALGEBRA GRADE IS AN A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WWWOOOOOHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
I don't think I've ever been this excited about Math before... ;)
It's a repeat of this...
Only this time I got a three... What a way to ruin a week... :(
I knew the high wouldn't last long... Just finished 6 hours of homework and project work. Bad news is that it took me 6 hours. Good news is that I feel really confident that all the answers are right...
Only time will tell...
Stress sucks... :(
I've got a bad feeling that this week is going to suck... And it's only Monday... :(
Jen didn't get home until 2:00 AM last night and I don't even remember her coming home. I woke up at 6:00 AM this morning to turn the alarms off for Jen since she was asleep. Next thing I know, I get a phone call from her saying that her van is stuck and she wants to know what time I have to be in class... I still don't know if that was a dream or not...
Then after that, I look at the clock and it was 9:15 AM. My first class of the day started at 9:00 AM. So after rushing to school, I make it for the second half of class. Well that teacher is just repeating all the notes that I just printed out. I got out of there to write this. Now I'm waiting to goto a recitation that I don't want to go to...
Wah...
This makes me embarrassed to be a geek...
It's 17 megs, right click and download:
Link Down... :(
Stress is piling on. This wasn't supposed to happen this soon... NOOO!!!!!
My only hope is that my Math class (the one I am taking for a third time) and the two ARM Processor classes will go well this semester. I could really use some B's and A's...
Gah...
I forced into another section of my MicroProcessors lab so I can be lab partners with acwmaiden! WOHOO!!! =)
All in all, yesterday and today were good days. School is actually looking up...
Yesterday morning went really good. First class was the lab class for processor class I and taking. We're working on ARM processors. They're the CPU's in PDA's, Cell Phones, and stuff like that. Kewl! I'm finally getting into the stuff I want to...
Next class was not that much fun. It's the second in a series of classes that I started last semester. The teacher sucks and its goign to be those stupid 10 point exams again... Gah... At least smilemore is in my class...
Today was going better actually. The retake math course is actually looking pretty good right now. They got a new book (look below for details) that, I found out, is much better than the first. Lots more introduction to the material. Plus, I heard the teacher was horrible. While he is boring, I was able to stay awake the whole class so that is a big plus. ;)
My next class was the lecture to the lab class from monday. Acwmaiden was there with me so that was kewl. What's awesome is that the intro was about what a CPU is and how it works. Umm, I learned about that stuff in the fourth grade so maybe this is a REALLY good omen. :)
Next class was another EE class based on signals. Teacher is horrible and the material sucks but he got himself a big bonus on the first day. We had to buy a tiny little textbook for this class which was about $112. He starts the class by saying that we need to goto a local copy shop and buy copies of his lecture notes for $40. I was like WHAT!?!?!? $152 for this little class when I got the book for the both of the processor classes for $40. Then he says, "If you get them, then you will have no need for the book. You can use it as reference material." Reference material my a$$. ;) Hello $112! (Guess you could ignore the entry from a couple of days ago now.)
So things are looking up for the moment...
Back into the battle tommorrow... I hope this semester is not as stressful...
I've already had something bad happen to me... The math department decided to change books for one of the courses I am retaking... There goes $100 I didn't already have... :(
Bah...
So much for writing something every day... :(
I got my student loan refund check! Yippee for feeling rich for a couple of days!!! Now to spend it on all my bills... :\
I PASSED! YIPPEE!!!
*does happy dance*
*see poeple staring*
*cough* Nothing to see here. Move along... ;)
When you're doing really good, feeling well, and pretty confident about yourself, something ALWAYS smacks you on your face and says wake up idiot.
Moral: Never be confident and always be paranoid of something bad happening. That way when it does, you won't feel as bad... (Sucky moral - yes, serves a real purpose - yes, happened to me - all the time)
I hate math. I have always hated math. Math is evil... Period.
So I bomb my math course. I was expected a C or better. I get a D+. Now my schedule is all messed up. For the first time in my LIFE I get a final grade of a D and have to goto summer school because of it (to keep me on track and make up lost time otherwise I'll be back for one semester after my senior year for one course. ONE DAMN COURSE.). But wait, that's passing so why are you bitching? YOU WANNA KNOW WHY? Because the of friggin high standards that my damn program has which is aimed at driving students out and ignoring the ones who really try.
What do I mean? My department has a requirement that your average has to be higher than a 2.5. A C is a 2.0. So the program is weeding out all the people who are average. What does that mean? Lemme tell you. I went to my counselor about this (because I am now on academic probation) and we tried to figure out something that I could to to bring up my GPA. She looked at my courses and actally said, "all these C's are killing you". It's not that I'm getting mixed A's and F's. It's that I'm trying my best in all my classes and I'm jsut pulling C's. Why am I pulling C's? Life. I'm gonna leave it at that. Wanna know more? Read the archives...
You wanna know the kicker? How fscking stupid do you have to be to take a math course three times? ... Guess what?!? I AM! This will now be the third time taking the friggin course. I resigned the first one because I saw this coming (thank gawd). Now I get a D+. And now I have to take it again... Math will not leave me alone. This is the only Math course I have left and I'll be out. Nope, not me. Can't get by this one...
*long-depressing-can't-beat-this-bull$hit-and-feel-like-giving-up sigh*
Why can't I win... :(
Classes are over. Projects are turned in. Fiinals are all that is left. It's sad at how much those are going to decide my final GPA... :\
Curves... WOHOO!!! All I can say is that I figured out one of my class grades. Before I take the final, it is a 53%. Pretty depressing... Then he says that the final can only HELP your grade, so if you bomb it, your average will not drop. KEWL!
Then he says a grade distribution is already posted on the website with the tentative grades. A 53% is a C-. WOHOO!!! If I ace the final, it moves up to a B+. If I fail the final (miserably), I still keep my C-. (Bad not not as bad as the F.)
GO ME!!!
The exams are over and I probably didn't do well on all of them... I know I did bad one one at least... I won't know about the others until a curve is posted...
For anyone who has been in college, you know how much curves rule! ;) For those who have not, it's kinda like this.
Say a class takes an exam and the average of the class is a 30 out of 100. Well instead of 75 or even a 65 being a C, the 30 is now a C. So people who got above 50 get A's and to fail you probably had to do worse than 10... Good for grades, bad for society...
Is there something between an "Oh $hit" and an "Oh man"?
I just got my grade back and I miserably failed. I got the ones that I guessed at right. The ones that I was confident on, I got wrong... But, because of the teachers grading policy, this exam grade is going to be dropped. So it's not that bad. But no I have to take the final, so that's bad. But I was planning on taking the final anyway, so its not that bad...
I need a hug... *laugh and sigh*
So break is over, I go back to school tommorrow. I should be excited. It's the last week of the semester... But I'm not. I'm worried about all the projects I have due and the three final exams I have this week...
I really hope all this is worth it in the end. All the stress and the bad grades and the horrible teachers... Well maybe not the bad grades... ;) Just the "tough-as-hell-assignments". It better turn out in the end or I swear I'll become a state park ranger or something...
Wow, life really has turned out to be like a rollar coaster for me. Aside from keeping away from the things I normally do (like this blog), school work has dominated my life. :(
Well, now all the current projects and test are done. Homework is finished, and I actually have nothing to do. I'm sorta in a cautious paranoid state right now.
I know another big bump is coming, I just don't feel it yet.
Gawd this month has been long. Everything has been moving so slowly, except for the school work and the time to do it in. :( I'm trying to get back to my normal routine but I don't see it happening until Thanksgiving.
BAH!!! :\
More programming... Yea... But this time it's no so bad. Kinda funny actually. The program generates random sentences based on a set of given grammars. HUH? Here:
The {noun} {verb} the {noun}.
Thats the format of a grammar. {noun} and {verb} are replaced by other things listed as nouns and verbs in the text file. What is funny about all of the is that the program creates completely random (and very funny) sentences...
Here's the output from a "How-They-First-Met" grammar file:
Margaret Thatcher was working as an animal groomer(specializing in iguanas), and Michael Jackson was by a happy coincidence, buying some liver and onions across the street. Just returning from the beach, he noticed the gulls circling what turned out to be her dining alone. Never the one to miss a chance for sex, Snookims, that what she called him, gave her his corny pickup line. The snare was set and she had no escape, she was caught like a deer looking into the headlights of his love. The students of Plato's teachings give us a charming idiom," It takes more than All the trees in the forest to build a great ox yoke."
Running it again, produces a completely different (and strange) sentence:
Queen Beatrix, just in from the Netherlands, was working as a customs inspector at the airport, and Tony Curtis was in town for a new tattoo. He noticed her while attending the premiere of a Rock Hudson movie. Never the one to miss a chance for sex, that sly dog told her they were meant to be lovers. Pandemonium ensued as they begin to ravage each other wildly. In reality it was never meant to be. It happened as was written in the Old Testament," Mint and bean curd make a drink that sweetens the bladder."
The kewl thing is if I can make up my own funky grammar, I can get extra credit. Guess I should write the program first, huh? =)
Well, just finished that programming project. What a boar... Glad its over though. Maybe I'll get around to posting it here... Maybe... ;)
Anyway, here's another flash clip for anyone interested... Grandma's are warned not to click on the link. =)
http://www.bfloeagle.com/flash/granny.swf
I'll be back soon...
Haven't had too much time to write about much lately. Three exams, projects up the wazoo, and work... I'll be back soon. Just wanted to shift the blog to October...
...how long it took me to do this... This is just the beginning to my first project for my Computer Science class. The little tux image is a robot in the world that was given to us (everything else in the picture). Just to display the world and that little image, took over 4 hours of coding. I haven't even begun to write the functions for the robot yet... :(
Hello long sleepless nights...
Well I got a 6 out of 10. Better than what I thought I was going to get... Now if the class average could just be a 3... *grin*
So it begins... The week when all my courses decide to have midterms and make projects do. I'm serious. All 6 of my classes are having an exam or a project due within 7 days... And two of the classes that have projects due this week, have exams next week...
Finished the first exam today... Wouldn't exactly call it finished... About 5 people out of the couple hundred were able to turn their exams in before the last five minutes of class... I was able to get 4 our of the ten answers. I had a good guess on two of them and the remaining for were just guess-and-pray choices...
Here's the kicker. It was a multiple choice, scantron test. No partial credit... Can anyone tell me how a scantron test determines if the person really knows what they are doing or if they are a really good guesser??? To me, it seems like this teacher does not give a crap about us... Nice guy, HORRIBLE teacher...
Here's the other thing. Five mintues after the exam, he posted the solutions. I haven't compaired my answer to the correct ones yet but from what I can tell, things don't look so good. But you know what? I don't care... I can't tell you why but I just don't give a crap about this anymore... I'm gonna finish my schooling, 2.0 or 4.0 either way, and be happy with what I did. I don't ever see myself using diodes and op amps in my job anyway. I see myself using Linux clusters and running gigabit networks in my job...
Plus there is a curve... So if I get 3 out of 10 right, that could easily become a C based on how everyone else did... :\
For anyone who has been to college, you'll probably know what I mean when I say this...
The nice professors are the worst teachers out there. It's the one's that are pricks that actually find a way to make you learn something...
This semester for example. There are two classes that I love going to because I actually can understand the material. (I can't believe I just said I love going to class...) Both of the teachers are extreme hardasses and don't take anything from students. One is a good lecturer and just trucks though everything, the other has a twisted, sick sense of humor that he intertwines with his lectures. But in both classes, I never fall asleep and I never lose interest...
In all my other classes, the professors are the kindest people I know and I'm sure they are very proficient in their respective fields, but they can't teach for sh*t! I can't tell you a damned thing about whats going on in those classes. Neither can any of my friends. I mean one professor cannot keep his notes straight. The jumps back and forth between notes. He gives hour long lectures on material and then decides at the end of class to change something he told us at the beginning... RAHHH!!! Another one of my professors does not understand for the life of her that I am not an English major. Yes, I will skip your assigned reading and one page essay on that reading for my calculus test or my electronics lab. Sorry. Another one of my professors, I swear, is straight out of the Andy Griffith show. (Don't ask how I know about that show.) He lectures, makes strange out of this world comments, laughs at the math forumlas he writes on the board, and constantly mixes an "ummmmm..." in his lecture. Not that "ummm" is a bad thing because everyone does it, just imagine a very low droning sound, then repeat that 60+ times within the next hour and twenty minutes...
I just want this thirty grand piece of paper that says I know what I'm doing so I can get out of this hell hole!!!
Gotta love spending the weekends and the extra day you have off from school (Yom Kippur) doing homework... :(
BAH!!!
AHHHH!!! Not enough time in the day... Forgeting about things... Things like the Internet (and my blog). NOOOOOO!!! ;)
Pressure is mounting with school. Just had to cut back 5 hours a week with work... :( Homework up the yazoo, professors who can't teach, professors who can't speak english fluently, professors who believe you are their pets and only take their classes...
RAHHH!!! Is it Friday yet???